Grand Funk Starship - Part 3
SPACE DATE 2236.102
Being stranded in the cargo bay because the rest of the ship is still uninhabitable from the Tongu stink ray is starting to lose its charm. The feral shrieks coming from the abandoned corridors makes it hard to carry on a conversation, much less follow one of Powell’s interminable campfire sing-alongs. We’ve burned through the cargo of marshmallows and chocolate that we were supposed to be transporting to a Junior Ambassadors event, and we're now down to stale graham crackers. Jayda is still missing with the only pressure suit, and while I continue to subscribe to my theory that this is all just a practical joke of his, I’m not as certain of it as I was a week ago.
The animal howling outside the cargo bay doors is quite a head-scratcher (and a tritanium plating-scratcher as well, given the claw marks we’ve spotted on the walls, floors and on INFO’s shattered robot frame). Assuming this isn’t all part of Mr. Jayda’s gag (and if it is, I have to say bravo), then it’s probably for the best that we’re trapped in this cargo bay, whilst the creature (or creatures) have the run of the rest of the ship.
The good news is that Chief Beauregard has finally gotten INFO put back together and he’s up and running again. The bad news, however, is it seems that Chief somehow fouled up INFO’s ethical subroutines while switching him back on. With INFO’s morality protocols switched to maximum, he’s gotten all super-preachy and judgmental about everyone. He caught a pair of young ensigns making out in a triage tent this morning and he ripped the tent to shreds, spending half a paper spool lecturing them about living in sin. Later, he overheard me telling Powell one of my famously saucy jokes, and I (yes, me the captain!) received several scolding reproaches on his strips of paper! And now he refuses my orders to go back out and kill off the monster(s) roaming the ship because he’s a ‘conscientious objector’, whatever the hell that is.
I’m at a bit of a loss. Honestly, I would have thought that another Galactic Union ship would have come along and rescued us by now. Just please don’t let it be Reggie who saves us. Frankly, I’d rather us all starve to death.
Captain of the GSV Remarkable. This is my blog.